we've got a date with destiny, and it looks like she just ordered the lobster

team ND has been slacking big time on the posting front, granted.
to make up for our absence here's some dialogue from one of ASP's favorite films: mystery men.
i implore all readers to disregard dane cook's brief appearance in this trailer (and film i suppose) in addition to whole "smashmouth" factor. if you don't already love this film, please reinvestigate. it ranks high up on the list, along with heavyweights, of quintessential 90's comedies (which happen to also star ben stiller).
consider this cast: william h. macy, geoffrey rush, greg kinnear, hank azaria, paul reubens, eddie izzard, janeane garofalom ricky jay, MICHAEL BAY (as frat boy), mark mothersbaugh....
it doesn't get much better.



[Training field.]
(Raja stands, sloppily throwing forks at a target. The Sphinx
comes up behind him.)
Sphinx: Learn to hide your strikes from your opponent and you'll
more easily strike his hide.
(Raja tries again, and throws more successfully this time.)
(Cut to Shoveler sparring with Spleen. Sphinx stops them.)
Sphinx: How many weapons do you yeild?
Shoveler: Just one, Sphinx.
Sphinx: No. The fist, the knee, the elbow, the head! You must lash
out with every limb, like the octopus who plays the drums.
(Cut to Furious balancing a hammer on his head.)
Furious: Why am I doing this again?
Sphinx: When you can balance a tack hammer on your head, you
will head off your foes with a balanced attack.

[Training field outside Sphinx's tent--next day.]
Sphinx: (intercepts Furious) Why do you stand aside while the
others practice?
Furious: "Practice"? That's not practicing. That's--That's group
hugging. We should be busting in on Casanova right now.
Sphinx: He who questions training only trains himself at asking
questions.
Furious: What??

[Outside tents.]
(Everyone is sitting around sewing. Sphinx is supervising.)
Spleen: Who was looking for the pinking shears?
Invisible Boy: Oh, that was me.
Sphinx: Ah, yes. Work well on your new costumes, my friends. For
when you care for what is outside, what is inside cares for you!
Furious: You know, the clock is ticking here. Are we gonna sew
dresses all day or are we gonna rescue Amazing?..I need a thimble,
does anybody--
Sphinx: Patience, my son. To summon your power for the conflict
to come, you must first have power over that which conflicts you.
Furious: Okay, am I the only one who finds these sayings just a
little bit formulaic? "If you want to push something down, you have
to pull it up." "If you want to go left, you have to go right." It's--
Sphinx: Your temper is very quick, my friend. But until you learn to
master your rage--
Furious: Your rage will become your master? That's what you were
gonna say, right? Right?
Sphinx: ...Not necessarily.